Lesson One: The Self

    Lesson 1

    The first and most important lesson I learned in Com 2206 involves my Self. This is relative to Chapter 4 of the Adler: Interplay textbook, "Interpersonal Communication and the Self". Through this chapter we learn the 3 main parts of the Self, Self-Concept, Presenting the Self, and Disclosing the Self. This lesson has the most significance to me.

  Chapter 4.1

  Self-Concept is "the relatively stable set of perceptions you hold of yourself." (Adler et. al) Your self-concept not only reflects your appearance, but also who you are on the inside. Things such as your personality, your feelings, and passions can influence your self-concept. One sentence about self-concept stood out to me, "Even if you added hundreds of words, it could never be complete, and it will change somewhat over time." (Adler et. al) To me, this means that how you view yourself will always change as your self continues to develop. This tells me that worrying about our self-concept all the time is unnecessary. This leads me to my second point of self, Self-esteem.
    

    Self-esteem "is the part of the self-concept that involves evaluations of self-worth." (Adler et. al) While your self-concept focuses on qualities about yourself, self-esteem focuses on how you feel about these qualities. Self-esteem is something everyone deals with. Some people have high self-esteem, and some people have low self-esteem. People with high self-esteem are more confident in who they are, while people with low self-esteem worry more about their qualities that they deem low value. 

 Chapter 4.2

    This section of the chapter deals with how you present your self. There are two versions of your self, the perceived self, and the presenting self. Perceived Self is "the person you believe yourself to be, though it may not be accurate in every respect."(Adler et. al) Presenting Self is "a public image—the way you want to appear to others. In most cases the presenting self is a socially approved image"(Adler et. al) Your perceived self is more of the private side of you. In everyday relationships, you rarely reveal much of your private self. Your presenting self is your public side, the side you want people to see. Different people see your presenting self differently based on your relationship to them. 

Chapter 4.3

    This final section of the Chapter deals with disclosing parts of your self. There are three points that make an act of communication self-disclosing. You must reveal personal information about yourself, you must communicate the information on purpose, and someone else must be the target for this information. Many people don't feel comfortable disclosing personal information until the given relationship reaches a certain milestone. Other guidelines self-disclosure should follow include being honest, making the information relevant, thinking about how available the given information is, and the context in which the information is being shared.

How this affects me

    The points made in this blog have always been an issue for me. In hindsight, I have always had low self-esteem when it came to many aspects of myself. So that tells me I have had low opinions of my whole self-concept in one way or another. I also have noticed my perceived self and presenting self is way different. I put my best self-concepts towards the front of my presenting self while dealing with what I deem as the worst parts of myself alone. As for disclosing myself, I don't share personal information with people very often, until I feel extremely comfortable with the given person. 

    Reading through this chapter gave me a better understanding of the issues I have with my overall self. Since reading this chapter I have begun working on these issues and my self-esteem has drastically increased.

Citations

Adler, Ronald, B. et al. Adler: Interplay. Available from: eCampus, (15th Edition). Oxford University Press Academic US, 2020.

“15,185 Self Esteem Stock Photos and Images.” 123RF, 123RF, https://www.123rf.com/stock-photo/self_esteem.html.

Frenta. “3D Puppet with Two Masks in Hands Stock Illustration - Illustration of Entertainment, Feeling: 10314628.” Dreamstime, 30 July 2009, https://www.dreamstime.com/royalty-free-stock-photos-3d-puppet-two-masks-hands-image10314628.